Stuff Sickness

Sometimes I get sick because of stuff. Not literally, but my values get thrown off. Last night we were on the way home from Paige's birthday party (Sherri's sister's 2 year old) and Hannah stated that she felt sick and was going to throw up and next thing we knew, she was puking in the van. It was all over her clothes, her seat, the floor, the back of Sherri's seat, and then the smell started wafting my way. Sherri had turned around and was trying to comfort a balling Hannah and I was boiling on the inside. I was thinking about how much work it would be to get the puke out of the carpet in the van, the likely long night we had ahead of us, and how put out I was because of the stink that was invading my nostrils. We got home much more quickly than I would have anticipated (someone throwing up in the car tends to encourage one to go slightly over the speed limit), and got Hannah into the bathtub and I began cleaning out the car and throwing stuff away. As I cleaned I got more upset. We have a nice van and now there is puke all over it. As I muttered some choice words under my breath Sherri came out and we finished cleaning together.

Later, I came to my senses, and I started thinking about how I react in situations where my stuff is wronged. I get upset because I feel wronged and usually, it's not really that big of deal. The thing is, I often get confused about my place in this world (slight Michael W. Smith reference, sorry). I see myself as the owner rather than the steward. When that happens, the value on that which is in my life becomes skewed. Suddenly, the van that I own, which is not going to last very long anyway, momentarily displaces my daughter who is infinitely more valuable. God's design for me is that I am his steward, he is the owner. Of course I've known this, actually, I've preached this, but in the moment, I forget this.

When things are focused, and I remember my place things change. I am no longer as concerned about my stuff that I "own." It becomes about investing in what matters as a steward. What's more valuable of investment -- the van or Hannah? Obvious answer.

Last night, take two... Last night, as we were coming home from Paige's birthday party, Hannah got sick in the car and threw up all over God's van. We raced home and got Hannah cleaned up and then Sherri and I, as God's stewards, cleaned up His van.

Funny that Sticks

I recently finished a new book called Made to Stick. It's written be brothers who wanted to explain why some things are memorable and some things are not. The great thing about this book is that it will help anyone who likes to or needs to communicate a message. It was a fun book to listen to and easily kept my attention. Some great stories and the principles are easy to catch.

Speaking of sticky, on Sunday night we went with our friends, Lemkes and Gambees, to see Jim Gaffigan in Saginaw. If you have never heard him before, you must... I think he is the funniest man in the universe. I literally laughed for about an hour and a half... my stomach muscles are still a little sore from laughing! I love Jim Gaffigan! So, watching Gaffigan was not only entertaining, but make me think about preaching. As I looked on stage, all I saw was a stool, a water bottle, and a mic on a mic stand. That's it. And then I laughed for the next 90 minutes. He had me at "hello". Think of the average church service and message, how long does the pastor preach... 25 minutes, 40 minutes, an hour? And how much of that message are you actually listening to? Did he have you at "hello" or did he ever have you at all? What if pastors only had a stool and a mic? Would churches be empty? It seems that the message of Jesus and growth in Him is infinitely more important than a brilliant comedy routine. I went to Gaffigan expecting to laugh out loud. Is is any different to go to church expecting to be challenged and captivated by what the pastor shares regardless of his visuals and set-up? It may not be as black and white as this, but I do think that there is something of value here.

Jamaica!

Well, Sherri and I just got back from Jamaica. We took 27 students from Southfield Christian (where I work) and 4 adults and spent a week working and serving children in orphanages and schools. I, not being big on children other than my own, was challenged just being there. If you want to see some video of what we did, you can check out cjwebber.blogspot.com. Chris is one of my students and friends who shot some video of our trip. We also shot our own version of a nooma (teaching videos made by Rob Bell). Hopefully, we can get it uploaded to the net and my blog. It is pretty funny and my one attempt of seeming like I am important.

Joshua, A Coming of Age Story

Ok, I have not blogged for a while and I doubt that anyone checks this anymore but there are moments in life that necessitate the sharing of stories. Warning, this is not a story for those faint of heart....

Josh will be turning 3 in about a week. He is at that point where he is becoming more and more aware of himself. So, the other evening as I was getting him into his diaper (he still does diapers through the night) he chose to inform me of something very important in his little world. He was naked and I laid him down to fasten the diaper on his body when he grabbed his "person" and proclaimed to me, "I like playing with mine balls." Sometimes all you can do is laugh out loud and believe that things will not get more complicated.

I Have Issues

"What is God's will for my life?"

Bruce Waltke says that is the wrong question. I'm in a discipleship group and we are working through his book, Finding the Will of God. His approach is atypical to much of what's out there. One of the things that struck me is that I typically read the Bible to enjoy the stories, get the principles, and teach others. The question Waltke asks is, "Are you impassioned with finding God's heart as you interact with His word?" As I thought about that, the norm for me is reading in order to teach and communicate with others - not wrong, but it is easy for me to ignore the part about finding God's heart. So, basically, he says that asking what God's will is for your life is not the question, God's will is easy to follow if your heart is continuously confronted with God's heart and the two begin to beat together. When that happens, decisions come easy because your life lines up with God's desires and will. He even gives steps that we need to follow to bring our hearts into line with God's: Reading the Bible, developing a heart for God, seeking wise counsel, looking for God's providence, does it make sense, and divine intervention. He sees the first, reading the Bible, as the foundation and most important by far. Anyway, I read the chapter on providence last week and decided that I hated it because it hits too close to home for me. He says,

"There will be times you believe the Word of God is leading you to do something, it becomes the desire of your heart, and other Christians encourage you to follow your heart, but providence will not allow it. Assume that god has something else planned. Learn to trust God in spite of your circumstances."

Have you ever been somewhere and everything seems right but that silly providence screws everything up? I hate that. As much as I have accepted where I am right now, I still struggle with not being where I desperately want to be. Now, thanks to Waltke, I have a name to blame for my frustration - Providence. And what it comes down to for me is the issue of trust. I know that God has a plan and that He is good. My issue is whether or not His plan has been endorsed by me. Being a pastor in a church is not unbiblical, it's the desire of my heart, and other believers and seekers encourage me to pursue that end but that dammed providence keeps all of this just out of reach. And in saying "dammed providence", I really am saying that if that is what you want God, then take it back and let me pursue my dreams! Do I really trust that God is going to do what is best? When everything seems like it is not on schedule and I see little to no hope, do I trust God? Part of trust is letting go of your own image. We are created in God's image and then we spend the rest of our lives trying to create our image. What I think I want to be comes colliding with what God wants to do. Perhaps eventually, I will look back in hindsight and say, "Oh, yes, now I understand what God was doing." Until then, I have to trust and live in that tension of passionately living life by striving for goals and getting out of the way of what God is doing whether that may or may not look like much.

Afraid of Form

I have a friend who just bought his first house. He and his wife are excitedly stocking the house with furniture, appliances, and rooms full of love. I am really happy for them but I do have a concern and that is this... What kind of house did they buy? I mean, is it a ranch, a bungalow, a colonial, or a Tudor? Is it one of those cookie cutter houses in the suburbs or is it a house we describe as having lots of character which really means that it will suck all the savings you will ever have? See, here's the thing, I am comfortable in only a few types of houses. I live in a typical 1980's Michigan colonial. Sherri is partial to vinyl-sided ranches with the garage on the side so that’s not the first thing you see. I like houses with alot of stone. Anything else is suspect and I'm not sure that I can really hang out with anyone not in a house that is in the style of the three mentioned previously. I once knew someone who lived in a Tudor--they were jerks. Therefore, I don't like Tudors because they house mean people. I do like vinyl-sided ranch houses because that was the first house I ever bought. I'm pretty sure only good people live in those. It's funny how I'm not concerned about the materials in the house, just the style. Asbestos? Lead based paint? Cat urine in every corner? That's fine as long as the form of the house is to my liking. Surely I am insane! This is not for real, is it?

No, rather than talking about houses, lets talk about churches. Instead of the style of a house, let’s talk about the form of church. There are traditional, orthodox, charismatic, emerging, modern, post-modern, contemporary, and mega churches. These are all forms. The interesting thing is that some of us are afraid of the very mention of one or more of these forms. "I hate traditional churches because they are boring and the typical pastor doesn't even try to be relevant." "I think that post-modern churches are of the devil. I don't even think those pastors know who Jesus is!" I got into a conversation with someone who wanted to learn more about this thing called the emerging church as if it was some import from Japan. So, I gave him a few books and he is on his way to enlightenment.

At the very bottom of everything, I am not so sure that traditional, postmodern, contemporary, emerging, or modern is something that really matters. It's just form. The only real churches are the churches whose content and raw material is reflective of the Jesus who is revealed in God's Word. If a church is has that, then the form must take whatever will best reach the immediate community where it serves. I don't care what "form" that is because it becomes meaningless if no one is being connected to Jesus through it... and it would be nice if there was a steeple, because that's how a church is supposed to look.

Things I Need On The Go

This past weekend, I spoke at a youth retreat in Xenia, OH. I took with me a friend, Chris, and we had a great time. On Saturday night, we had one of the best experiences of my life while we were searching to fill his craving for an Arizona Arnold Palmer Tea. Picture this, it's 10:30 at night and Bright Eyes is blaring through the speakers. The air is crisp and cool as winter peaks its head around the corner. We stop at Fulmers grocery store and find nothing but questioning stares mainly because Chris wears tight jeans, a shirt, and a scarf - not exactly the trend in clothing in Xenia (unfortunately Chris does not have a camouflaged scarf which would have built a bridge with the locals). We stopped at a convenience store/gas station and still nothing. After about 5 stops, one of which I picked up a box of 6 day old cream filled chocolate iced Krispy Kream doughnuts (by the way, bad idea to eat 3 with a Mt. Dew), we found the holy grail of beverage stores. As we turned the corner, there it was, as if a shaft of light was illuminating the entire lot. We had stumbled upon a drive through liquor store. It was a narrow building with a garage door on either side. We drove in and lowered our window as a man came up and asked us what we wanted. Chris asked for a Palmer and the man went to the cooler. Unfortunately, he came up empty and we were out of luck. But nothing could taint our experience. I drove out the other end the store and felt satisfied because I had just experienced the next evolutionary stage of convenience - beer on the go! Doesn't it just make sense? Imagine, I'm in a hurry, running late and I need something to drink. What can be done? Good news, just drive through the local drive-thru liquer store and get a cold one to go! Finally, a drive-thru liquor store is exactly what the modern drunk-on-the-go needs. Thank you America!

The Winds of Change

There are alot of happy people and alot of unhappy people this week. In fact, many of the happy people have traded places with the unhappy people. Yet, there are also alot of life goes on people who care little to none. What the heck am I talking about? Decision 2006, of course. I voted. Motivated hugely to get the politicians to stop bombarding me with commercials and phone calls. I hate elections. However, based on recent conversations, I have some thoughts.

It is time for change, and I am not talking about political change. I am talking about a change in how those who follow Christ engage the rest of society. There are places where the terms Republican and Christian are synonymous. There are also places (fewer but growing) where it is unbelievable that a Christian would not be a Democrat. I am pretty sure that the boat has been missed on both accounts. The Religious Right is an oxymoron, because the religious are rarely right (right applies more to Jesus than an establishment) and by definition, Christianity is not inclusive (yes, you have to make a radical decision to dedicate yourself to the values and agenda of One who makes the absolutes and there is no such thing as tolerance in that arena). I guess I frankly don't care how you vote, given, your decisions will have consequences, but holding a political platform up in one hand and a Bible in the other is a horrible idea. Why would I ever consider placing a sign in my front yard supporting a candidate that may close a door with a neighbor or a passerby? Guess what, both Republicans and Democrats (and anyone else for that matter) need Jesus. Funny how Jesus himself hung out with tax collectors (who were seen as having turned their backs on both Yahweh and Israel) and didn't make a big deal about politics.

I think its time the church stopped letting politicians "preach" in church on Sundays close to the election and I think that the church has to stop fulfilling its desire to have power by making political alliances. Things look similar to the Roman Catholic Church before the Reformation. I don't agree with the contemporary interpretation of separation of church and state. Kids have every right to say God and pray in schools. The problem is that the church is not affiliated with a political party, it is radically and completely devoted and sold out to Jesus Christ and I guarantee that Jesus Christ is not wearing a tee-shirt with a donkey or an elephant! If Jesus is wearing a tee-shirt, it probably has a sad face with a tear running down its cheek (perhaps similar to the sad Indian in the old anti-pollution commercial) because of how his bride parades herself around waiting to be wooed by whoever can use the right lingo. I guess I am at the point that if I hear one more person use Republican/Democrat as a foundational characteristic of someone who is going to heaven then I am going to pee on their bumper stickers.

Quote of the Day

This weekend, Sherri was gone on a retreat so I was at home with the children. What exactly does that mean? It means I cared for them during the day, put them to bed early, and I watched movies all night! One of the movies I watched was Green Street Hooligans, a movie recommended by some of my students. It does have a decent amount of violence and language (there's my disclaimer so I can't get in trouble). Anyway, Elijah Wood plays a young man about to graduate from Harvard who gets wrongly kicked out and moves to England to see his sister. Long story short, he gets involved with a British style, European soccer groupie fight club. As he becomes one of the guys, he does the voice-over narrator thing about half way through the movie and says something that leveled me. In reference to being part of the GSE (green street elite), he says, "It's not knowing that your friends have your back, it's knowing that you have your friends back." This is the difference between being a consumer and being missional (okay, yes, everything I hear and see goes through a "church" filter).

Ok, so you think I'm spiritualizing this? Hear me out... When I want to be assured that someone has my back, all I am thinking about is me. My chief concern is me. It's not about them, it's about me. "You watch out for me." It's like I am sucking the life out of the people around me. I want them to defend and care for and think of me first. While that may make me feel good, it doesn't make me a good person. I do want to know that someone has my back, but I what is more important is that I have their back. It's the difference between giving and receiving. I want to live my life in a way where people see me as someone who will get their back, not as someone who's back needs to be gotten.

iTunes & Bikers

Today was a great day. First off, and ultimately less important, I am now on iTunes. If you go to iTunes and search for the Shiloh podcast, you will find a message I preached on Nehemiah chapter one (that is if you care to listen to it).

On to the amazing, emotional, sobering event of the day. A former student of the school I work at was killed in Iraq recently and the funeral was held at the church today. Obviously, this day was not easy for the family and friends of this young man. The funeral was very meaningful and everything went as well as could be expected. Before the funeral, I walked outside and was shocked to see about 50 bikers standing like sentinels around the building. They were all dressed in their leather gear and each one was holding an American flag. This is a group of bikers who attend military funerals in the area, they had no connection with the family or anyone at the church. There is a group of freakshows who travel around and protest at military funerals shouting horrible things at family members. I don't know if you have heard of these people but I'm not sure what I would do if I came into contact with one of them. Anyway, these bikers have taken it upon themselves to "stand guard" around military funerals. I was talking to one of the guys, thanking him for what he was doing and he responded with, "It is the least we can do for those who are giving their lives for our freedom." After that, I watched as Marines in full dress shook hands with these bikers thanking them for their encouragement and support... and I lost it. Words cannot express the emotion that welled up as I watched a group of strangers making their stand in support of a family that had suffered a terrible loss. Today, I was reminded that people do amazing things. Things that are unselfish, things that put others before them, and things that give us glimpses of who God created us to be. Today I was proud to be an American (now cut to black and start the music)

I'm Baaaack...

What is it that could be so compelling to bring me back to blogging? A video that I can't help but share with the small handful of people who read (or more appropriately used to read) my blog. A friend showed me this video tonight and I am now equipped to worship God as he has created me to. Enjoy!

It Can't be Me

As I sit here in my very messy office, listening to Sufjan Stevens I am reflecting on the possibility that I might be the problem. This morning I finished reading Patrick Lencioni's Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable. It's one of those books that almost everyone involved in leadership or on a team of any kind talks like they read it but in reality they've only heard other people talk about it (I was one of those people until this morning). I think everyone who is not a monk with a vow of silence should read (or listen to) it. It is entertaining, thought provoking, challenging. I laughed, I cried... anyway, it did get me thinking about the 5 dysfunctions: 1)Absence of Trust, 2) Fear of Conflict, 3) Lack of Commitment, 4) Avoidance of Accountability, and 5) Inattention to Results. I am pretty sure that I have never actually been on a healthy team. Regardless of the venue (church, school, work, and even individual relationships) there is a struggle to follow through on any one of these areas. Sherri and I had a conversation recently and dysfunction number 2 came up. My comment was that anyone who is not willing to tow the line of a healthy team cannot live in my house. She ignored me because she knows how I get with an exciting new idea. Anyway, the question I am wrestling with is this, if I have been on teams that are heavy laiden with these dysfunctions, am I the reason? As much as I can identify with the hero in the story, I think I am much more like the dysfunctional teammates. Hopefully that feeling will go away because it just can't be me.

Who Peed?

Ok, so I haven't been doing any updating lately. Sorry. The other morning, Sherri and I are in bed, not quite awake yet. Now, understand that we have been having allergies lately and you know how that goes sleeping with your mouth open so you can breathe. Josh walks in and climbs into bed with us...

(Seeing the drool on the pillow)
Josh: Mommy pee on pillow?
Mommy: No, Josh, I did not pee on my pillow.
Josh: Mommy peed on pillow?
Mommy: No, Josh, mommy did not pee on her pillow.
(Mommy gets out of bed to get ready for the day)
Josh: Daddy, you pee mommy's pillow?
Daddy: (while laughing) No, daddy did not pee on mommy's pillow.
Josh: I no pee mommy's pillow.

I love mornings.

Waving the White Flag

Today I preached to 4 adults and 1 child. Afterwards, I talked to Joe (it took me a while to find him in the crowd). The congregation (the five there and one more who would meet them later along with the denominational guy in charge) met today to decide the future of the church. After talking to the really old woman for about 10 minutes (conversation consisting of, "You remind me of my grandson. That's why I like you. My daughter wants me to move down south. It's were I belong." Repeat exact conversation 5 times), I got to Joe. With tears in his eyes, he said that there really is not much of a decision to be made. The church can't survive. I am not sure how much longer they are going to hang on, but I will stick with them to the end.

I have always felt that if a church is not moving people into a deeper relationship with Christ and effectively reaching its community then it needs to seriously consider whether or not it should continue. I think alot of pastors do not have a calling on their lives and they are either relieved that they made it through another day or fake it successfully. It would not be a bad think for many churched to close their doors for the last time. However, as I have watched Joe and talked to the other 4-5 people at this little church, I have seen the other side. I still believe that we have to be thoughtful of how we fit into the greater kingdom scope, but people who have served faithfully in a church all their lives have a difficult time letting go. There is so much emotion and hurt in considering closing down a church. Let's be honest, who is going to be there at the bitter end? The ones who have been there for almost as long as they have been alive. This church is closing; there is no way around that. It is a good thing it is closing; it's not right for them to continue this way. What they need is love and compassion. And I am just the guy for the job (to be read with great sarcasm). I am not the most sensitive person when it comes to this. Why God has put me in this position suggests an oversight on His part (ok, maybe he sees more of the picture than me). Honestly, I think he put me there for that very reason - to see the reality of what many churches face and how to go about doing the right thing in a way that is full of grace.

Catching Toads

How do my girls catch toads? With butterfly nets of course! This morning, Allison and Hannah brought me a toad in their butterfly net. They didn't want to touch the toads so they improvised. Hannah thought it was hilarious when the toad tried climbing up the side of the net and then fell back down. They captured four toads and spent the rest of the day catching bugs, spiders, and flies. We looked for information on the internet as to what they typically eat and found that one toad can eat up to 1000 bugs a day. Sherri told them to get busy because they needed to find 4000 bugs in order to keep the toads in their small cage. The good news for any PETA members is that the girls were convinced to participate in a catch and release program. As far as I know, the toads have been set free.

Tony Danza (aka #@$%& Pt. 2)

Been thinking about the whole "God damn it" is comparable to "God take this back 'cause I don't want it" idea. I don't know anyone who saunters through life with the, nothin' but blue skies I can see clearly now the rain is gone attitude (shout out to Geoff Moore, you know, Beth's husband). I do know people who don't understand what is going on in their lives and they make choices about how to deal with that confusion. I am sure there are a plethora of ways people choose to respond but here are a few...

1. God doesn't exist
   
2. God exists but doesn't care
   
3. God exists and is vindictive
   
4. God exists and is good
   
5. God exists but does not consult me on future plans thus he is more concerned about his plans than my plans

I believe the first three are ruled out. The fourth is the right answer but not always (in fact often not) the perceived reality. The last one seems to be the most accurate description of my experience and I also think that there is much truth in it (although simplified). So looking at number 5, I see two responses. First, acceptance and trust that he really does know more than me and that he has my best in mind based on an eternal perspective. The second and more natural response is like returning a gift you received for your birthday. I really don't want this, it doesn't fit me, I'd rather have the money, I want a different color, etc. Essentially we reject the "gift." Not long ago, I got a gift from someone (who shall remain anonymous) and I acted like a child throwing a fit. Why? Because I already had one and it wasn't what I wanted. I was angry that someone would be so insensitive to give me something that they thought I should have rather than something that was within their power to give that I wanted. You can even ask Sherri (but please don't because she doesn't need to be reminded how immature I can be) how incredibly angry and stupid I was. What's the point? God gives us what he believes we should have rather than what we want even though it is within his authority to give us exactly what we want. When God does this, my default setting is, "I don't want it, take it back" (the kinder more gentler why of saying, "God, damn it").

My epiphany: When I respond with, "I don't want it, take it back" it is no different than taking God's name in vain.

So the question I have to ask when we get down to the very bottom of everything, in the word's of Tony Danza is, "Who's the boss?" If I can humble myself for just a second, then I can acknowledge that he really does know more than me and does have my best in mind perceived through the eyes of eternity.

#@$%&

"Thou shalt not take the Lord thy God's name in vain." But don't you want to sometimes? Like when you are driving anywhere in the Metro Detroit area. I concluded just this morning that almost everyone on the road is out to get me and it stems from the fact that I am an excellent driver and they are not. Going from point A to point B should not be that frustrating! So I have been wondering why I get so frustrated and angry with people and situations. I am reading The Enigma of Anger by Garret Keizer. This is one angry man who is very insightful about the different sides of anger. Anyway, he talks about the exclamation, "God damn it." Here is what he says...

"But with those angry words we move to another level of religious meaning. The angry person who invokes the name of God is acknowledging that the source of his frustration runs contrary to an expectation of divine benevolence. In other words, the world ought to work better. There ought to be figs on this tree. There ought to be some force, some angel, that prevents hammers from accidentally crushing thumbs. At the very least, it insists that the source of our frustration is within the control of a greater power - and a good one."

Keizer has penned exactly what I feel. When I get frustrated and things are not as they should be, I respond with an acknowledgement of God rather than wondering if He is even there. However, my acknowledgement of God is that if this is the way things work, then he can take those things back because I don't want them. It struck me that I go off because I don't like the way things are and I have higher expectations of my experiences, that I deserve better. It's like I feel entitled to a life of everything working out my way and when it doesn't, "God, damn it, because I don't want it." I'm like the child who screams at his mother, "You don't love me!" yet at the same time knowing the opposite is likely true and desperate for any attention he can get from the mother he is yelling at. A line in the song, Sweet Rose, by Matt Costa goes, "I'd like to say no one always gets their way." Simple, true, and annoying. I think sometimes the struggles of life are boiled down to checking yourself in those moments when you don't get your way and then you realize how truly immature you really are. The reality for me, is that I have no right to damn anything because I am not above it in the first place. So tomorrow, on my drive to school, I am going to acknowledge that God has "blessed" my trip by allowing me to experience its cussed existence.

Chad Vader

I found these on a friends blog. Brilliant. Enjoy.

Where to Draw the Line

Lately I have been filling the pulpit at a church on Sunday mornings. It is a church that is dying, both figuratively and literally. I went into this knowing only that it was a small church unable to support a full time pastor so I really didn't know what to expect. On a good day, I preach to 12 people including women and children (actually, there is only one other male other than me and he is in his mid 70's). Their plan is to disband in the next few months and they would like me to stick with them until they do so. So, today I got to church and Joe said that he was sorry and that only one of the 5 main regulars was going to show up and even she was questionable (they had various reasons that were relatively legit). Joe barely got the sentence out without breaking down. Joe was born into that church and has been serving faithfully throughout his whole life. Anyway, the one other elderly woman showed up and then one more. Joe said to me, Aileen, and Dorthy that I shouldn't waste my sermon on just the three of them and wait til next week for the rest of the crew. Here's what I've been thinking about all day... How few is too few and is there such a thing as a "wasted" sermon on anyone? I know the simplistic answer, when two or three are gathered... but I am looking for something deeper. I have friends who feel that preaching to a small handful of dying people is crazy and wouldn't do it, possibly legitimately so. Most everything inside me says that these people, regardless of how painful it might be, need to call it a day and throw in the towel now. However, there is one little part of me that wonders if I (or we) tend to dismiss people and churches like this out of pride and arrogance. Honestly, isn't it a waste of time and giftedness? Shouldn't someone like me be preaching to at least an average sized church? I have preached in a church of 2000, today, it was a church of about two (and I didn't end up preaching at all, which worked out because Joe said with great sadness that he couldn't pay me this week anyway on account of a large gas bill and an insurance payment). In the midst of growth strategy and mega-churches, have we become calloused to the least of these? Where is the line between pride and good stewardship with the resources God entrusts us (not to mention this churches limited resources)?

Dancing Queen

Sometimes you go out for a show and sometimes you stay in for a show. Last night we had some friends over, ate dinner, and then just hung out and talked. At one point during the evening, Hannah came into the family room and served us fruit snacks out of a bowl. It is so nice to see her practicing for her career at Hooters. Allison put in her Sheryl Crow CD and then proceeded to sing and dance to Soak up the Sun. This is when Josh entered wearing the attractive yet casual pink tutu. I kind of think he looks a little like Julie Andrews in his ballet outfit. Unfortunately, pictures cannot do justice to his performance. He was spinning wildly throughout the entire song and every so often stumbled and fell into various objects (I wasn't sure if he was drunk or had a stroke). Every time he fell, he got up and said, "I ok mommy." We laughed till tears were flowing.